Well Capeside HAS been a dull place this past week. Gossip has been short, what with Jen Lindley playing "nice girl at the book store!" Go ahead, DAWSON! Compare her to Meg Ryan in "You've Got Mail." You know you want to...YoU PEOPLE ARE ALL SO PREDICTABLE! But I DO know that Jack McPhee has his eyes on a new potential beau - and it's none other than Vince ? down at the docks. Jack has been "working" for him this past week...who knows what that entails?

 

Oh, and speaking of FAIRIES --- Everyone in town over the age of 10 knows the biggest fruitcake in town is that so-called "ice cream man," aka "Mr. Freeze." But did you know he was just released from Daleman penitentiary two years ago? (who knows? Maybe he's buddies with Joey's daddy, Mike Potter!) Anyway, anyone interested in his offense? I'm told he was sentenced to 10 years for sexually molesting a 5 year-old boy ... That's right, kiddies, Mr. Freeze is a pedophile and don't you forget it! I don't know about you, but I personally won't be partaking in any creamsicles this particular summer...

 

Oh...one more itsy bitsy little thing, my friends. I've been making some promises, and don't worry, I intend to follow through on them. Can't be too careful these days though what with Wimpy Witter getting Daddy the Sheriff all involved!!! BUT HAVE NO FEAR WITTER. Wait till you see what I have in store for yoU! I have in my possession, a series of (AWWWWW...)LOVE LETTERS between the Pacey and his wacked out girlfriend in the nut house. How, you might ask? YOU NEVER NEED KNOW!!! Don't believe me? Check back next time for the first installment. And you thought nothing could top Abby's diary... Just you wait, Capesiders... --EYES